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作者︰shyungchongzeng 來源︰he)wen)章閱讀網 時間︰2020-03-08 04:52 閱讀︰

 Dear Daughter:
親愛的女兒
  As we drove off from Columbia, I wanted to write a letter to you to tell you all that is on my mind.

當我們開車駛出哥倫比(bi)亞(ya)大學的時候,我想寫一封信給你(ni),告(gao)訴你(ni)盤旋在我腦中的想法。

  First, I want to tell you how proud we are. Getting into Columbia is a real testament of what a great well-rounded student you are. Your academic, artistic, and social skills have truly blossomed in the last few years. Whether it is getting the highest grade in Calculus, completing your elegant fashion design, successfully selling your painted running shoes, or becoming one of the top orators in Model United Nations, you have become a talented and accomplished young woman. You should be as proud of yourself as we are.

首先,我想告(gao)訴你(ni)我們為你(ni)感到特(te)別(bie)驕(jiao)傲(ao)。進入哥倫比(bi)亞(ya)大學證明你(ni)是一個全面發展的優(you)秀學生,你(ni)的學業、藝術和社交技能最近(jin)都有(you)卓越的表現,無(wu)論是你(ni)在微積分上得了最高(gao)分,完成自(zi)己典雅的時尚(shang)的設計,成功(gong)賣(mai)出繪(hui)制pin)吶芐  huai)是在“模擬聯合國”演說中成為表現最突出的人之一,你(ni)毫(hao)無(wu)疑問已經是一個多(duo)才多(duo)藝的女孩。你(ni)的父(fu)母為你(ni)感到驕(jiao)傲(ao),你(ni)也應該像我們一樣為自(zi)己感到自(zi)豪。

  I will always remember the first moment I held you in my arms. I felt a tingling sensation that directly touched my heart. It was an intoxicating feeling I will always have. It must be that "father-daughter connection" which will bind us for life. I will always remember singing you lullaby while I rocked you to sleep. When I put you down, it was always with both relief (she finally fell asleep!) and regret (wishing I could hold you longer). And I will always remember taking you to the playground, and watching you having so much fun. You were so cute and adorable, and that is why everybody loved you so.

我會(hui)永遠(yuan)記得第一次將(jiang)你(ni)抱在臂彎的na)na)一刻,一種新鮮shi)ji)動的感覺(jue)瞬bu)浯? 宋業男模 na)是一種永遠(yuan)讓我陶醉(zui)的感覺(jue),就是那(na)種將(jiang)我們的一生都聯結在一起(qi)的“an)概 榻帷薄N乙渤3O肫qi)我唱著(zhou)催眠曲輕搖你(ni)入睡,當我把你(ni)放下的時候,常常覺(jue)得既解脫又惋惜,一方面我想,她終于睡著(zhou)了!另一方面,我又多(duo)麼(me)希望自(zi)己可以(yi)yuan)啾 ni)一會(hui)兒。我還(huai)記得me)ni)到運動場,看著(zhou)你(ni)玩得那(na)麼(me)開心,你(ni)是那(na)樣可愛,所(suo)有(you)人都非常愛你(ni)。

  You have been a great kid ever since you were born, always quiet, empathetic, attentive, and well-mannered. You were three when we built our house. I remember you quietly followed us every weekend for more than ten hours a day to get building supplies. You put up with that boring period without a fuss, happily ate hamburgers every meal in the car, sang with Barney until you fell asleep. When you went to Sunday Chinese school, you studied hard even though it was no fun for you. I cannot believe how lucky we are as parents to have a daughter like you.

你(ni)不但長(chang)得可愛,而且是個特(te)別(bie)乖巧(qiao)的孩子。你(ni)從不吵鬧、為人著(zhou)想,既听話又有(you)禮(li)貌。當你(ni)三歲我們建房子的時候,每個周末十(shi)多(duo)個小時你(ni)都靜靜地跟著(zhou)我們去(qu)運建築材料,三餐在車上吃著(zhou)漢堡,唱著(zhou)兒歌,唱累了si)退 jue),一點都不嬌氣不抱怨。你(ni)去(qu)上周日的中文(wen)學習班時,盡管一點也不覺(jue)得有(you)趣,卻依然很努力。我們做父(fu)母的na)苡you)像你(ni)這樣的女兒真的感到非常幸yi)/A>。

  You have been an excellent elder sister. Even though you two had your share of fights, the last few years you have become best friends. Your sister loves you so much, and she loves to make you laugh. She looks up to you, and sees you as her role model. As you saw when we departed, she misses you so much. And I know that you miss her just as much. There is nothing like family, and other than your parents, your sister is the one person who you can trust and confide in. She will be the one to take care of you, and the one you must take care of. There is nothing we wish more than that your sisterhood will continue to bond as you grow older, and that you will take care of each other throughout your lives. For the next four years, do have a short video chat with her every few days, and do email her when you have a chance.

你(ni)也是個很好的姐姐。雖然你(ni)們姐妹(mei)以(yi)前也會(hui)打架,但是長(chang)大後,你(ni)們真的mou)晌 撕A href="http://www.duwenzhang.com/huati/pengyou/index1.html">朋友(you)。妹(mei)妹(mei)很愛你(ni),很喜(xi)歡逗(dou)你(ni)笑,她把你(ni)當成她的榜樣看待。我們開車離(li)開哥大後,她非常想你(ni),我知道你(ni)也很想她。世(shi)界上最寶貴的就是家(jia)人。和父(fu)母一樣,妹(mei)妹(mei)就是你(ni)最可以(yi)信任的人。隨著(zhou)年齡的增長(chang),你(ni)們姐妹(mei)之間的na)橐瓴槐洌 ni)們互(hu)相(xiang)照應,彼(bi)此si)匭模 餼褪俏易釹M降氖慮榱恕T諛ni)的大學四(si)na)輳 you)空時你(ni)一定要(yao)常常跟妹(mei)妹(mei)視頻(pin)聊聊天,寫寫電子郵shi)

  College will be the most important years in your life. It is in college that you will truly discover what learning is about. You often question "what good is this course". I encourage you to be inquisitive, but I also want to tell you: "Education is what you have left after all that is taught is forgotten." What I mean by that is the materials taught isn't as important as you gaining the ability to learn a new subject, and the ability to analyze a new problem. That is really what learning in college is about this will be the period where you go from teacher-taught to master-inspired, after which you must become self-learner. So do take each subject seriously, and even if what you learn isn't critical for your life, the skills of learning will be something you cherish forever.

大學將(jiang)是你(ni)人生最重要(yao)的時光(guang),在大學里你(ni)會(hui)發現學習的真諦。你(ni)以(yi)前經常會(hui)問到 “這個課程有(you)什(shi)麼(me)用(yong)”,這是個好問題,但是我希望你(ni)理解︰“教育(yu)的真諦就是當你(ni)忘記一切(qie)所(suo)學到的東西之後所(suo)剩下的東西。”我的意思(si)是,最重要(yao)的不是你(ni)學到的具(ju)體的知識,而是你(ni)學習新事物和解決新問題的na)芰ΑU獠攀譴笱  暗惱嬲庖濉  飩jiang)是你(ni)從被動學習轉向(xiang)自(zi)主學習的階段,之後你(ni)會(hui)變成一個很好的自(zi)學者。所(suo)以(yi),即(ji)便你(ni)所(suo)學的不是生活里所(suo)急需的,也要(yao)認真看待大學里的每一門功(gong)課,就算學習的技能你(ni)會(hui)忘記,學習的na)芰κ悄ni)將(jiang)受用(yong)終身的。

  Do not fall into the trap of dogma. There is no single simple answer to any question. Remember during your high school debate class, I always asked you to take on the side that you don't believe in? I did that for a reason -- things rarely "black and white", and there are always many ways to look at a problem. You will become a better problem solver if you recognized that. This is called "critical thinking", and it is the most important thinking skill you need for your life. This also means you need to become tolerant and supportive of others. I will always remember when I went to my Ph.D. advisor and proposed a new thesis topic. He said "I don't agree with you, but I'll support you." After the years, I have learned this isn't just flexibility, it is encouragement of critical thinking, and an empowering style of leadership, and it has become a part of me. I hope it will become a part of you too.

不要(yao)被教條(tiao)所(suo)束(shu)縛,任何(he)問題都沒有(you)一個唯(wei)一的簡(jian)單的答案(an)。還(huai)記得當我幫助你(ni)高(gao)中的辯論課程時,我總是讓你(ni)站在你(ni)不認可的na)na)一方來辯論嗎?我這麼(me)做的理由就是希望你(ni)能夠理解︰看待一個問題不應該非黑即(ji)白,而是有(you)很多(duo)方法和角度。當你(ni)意識到這點的時候,你(ni)就會(hui)成為一個很好的解決問題者。這就是“批判的nai)si)維”——你(ni)的一生都會(hui)需要(yao)的最重要(yao)的nai)si)考方式,這也意味(wei)著(zhou)你(ni)還(huai)需要(yao)包(bao)容和支持不同(tong)于你(ni)的其他觀點。我永遠(yuan)記得我去(qu)找(zhao)我的博士導師提出了一個新論題,他告(gao)訴我︰“我不同(tong)意你(ni),但我支持你(ni)。”多(duo)年後,我認識到這不僅(jin)僅(jin)是包(bao)容,而是一種批判式思(si)考,更是令(ling)人折(zhe)服的領導風格,現在這也變成了我的一部(bu)分。我希望這也能成為你(ni)的一部(bu)分。

  Follow your passion in college. Take courses you think you will enjoy. Don't be trapped in what others think or say. Steve Jobs says when you are in college, your passion will create many dots, and later in your life you will connect them. In his great speech given at Stanford commencement, he gave the great example where he took calligraphy, and a decade later, it became the basis of the beautiful Macintosh fonts, which later ignited desktop publishing, and brought wonderful tools like Microsoft Word to our lives. His expedition into calligraphy was a dot, and the Macintosh became the connecting line. So don't worry too much about what job you will have, and don't be too utilitarian, and if you like Japanese or Korean, go for it, even if your dad thinks "it's not useful" : ) Enjoy picking your dots, and be assured one day you will find your calling, and connect a beautiful curve through the dots.

在大學里你(ni)要(yao)追(zhui)隨自(zi)己的激(ji)情和興趣,選你(ni)感興趣的課程,不要(yao)困擾于別(bie)人怎(zen)麼(me)說或怎(zen)麼(me)想。史蒂夫•喬布(bu)斯(si)曾經說過,在大學里你(ni)的熱情會(hui)創造出很多(duo)點,在你(ni)隨後的生命(ming)中你(ni)會(hui)把這些(xie)點串聯起(qi)來。在他著名(ming)的nai)si)坦福畢業典禮(li)演講中,他舉了一個很好的例子︰他在大學里修了看似毫(hao)無(wu)用(yong)me)Φ氖櫸  shi)年後,這成了隻huai)acintosh里漂亮字庫的基礎,而因為Macintosh有(you)這麼(me)好的字庫,才帶來了桌面出版和今(jin)天的辦公軟件(例如微軟Office)。他對書法的探索(suo)就是一個點,而隻huai)acintosh把多(duo)個點聯結成了一條(tiao)線。所(suo)以(yi)不要(yao)太擔心將(jiang)來你(ni)要(yao)做什(shi)麼(me)樣的工作,也不要(yao)太急功(gong)近(jin)利。假(jia)如你(ni)喜(xi)歡日語或韓(han)語,就去(qu)學吧,即(ji)使你(ni)爸爸曾認為那(na)沒什(shi)麼(me)用(yong)︰)盡興地選擇(ze)你(ni)的點吧,要(yao)有(you)信念有(you)一天機緣來臨時,你(ni)會(hui)找(zhao)到自(zi)己的人生使命(ming),畫出一條(tiao)美麗的na)摺

  Do your best in classes, but don't let pressure get to you. Your mother and I have no expectations for your grades. If you graduate and learn something in your four years, we would feel happy. Your Columbia degree will take you far, even if you don't graduate with honors. So please don't give yourself pressure. During your last few months in high school, you were so happy because there was little pressure and college applications are finished. But in the past few weeks, we saw you are beginning to worry (did you know you bite your nails when you are nervous?). Please don't be worried. The only thing that matters is that you learned. The only metric you should use is that you tried. Grades are just silly letters that give the vain people something to brag, and the lazy people something to fear. You are too good to be either.

在功(gong)課上要(yao)盡力,但不要(yao)給自(zi)己太多(duo)壓力。你(ni)媽(ma)媽(ma)和我yi)誄杉ㄉ隙閱ni)沒什(shi)麼(me)要(yao)求,只(zhi)要(yao)你(ni)能順利畢業並在這四(si)na)昀鋂?攪誦xie)東西,我們就會(hui)很高(gao)興了。即(ji)便你(ni)畢業時沒有(you)獲得優(you)異的mou)杉  ni)的哥倫比(bi)亞(ya)學位也將(jiang)帶你(ni)走得很遠(yuan)。所(suo)以(yi)別(bie)給自(zi)己壓力。在你(ni)高(gao)中生活的最後幾fu)鱸yue),因為壓力比(bi)較xian)。 笱 shen)請也結束(shu)了,你(ni)過得很開心,但是在最近(jin)的幾fu)魴瞧冢 ni)好像開始(shi)緊張起(qi)來。(你(ni)注意到你(ni)緊張時會(hui)咬(yao)指(zhi)甲嗎?)千萬別(bie)擔心,最重要(yao)的是你(ni)在學習,你(ni)需要(yao)的唯(wei)一衡(heng)量是你(ni)的努力程度。成績只(zhi)不huai)A href="http://www.duwenzhang.com/huati/xurong/index1.html">虛榮的人用(yong)以(yi)吹噓和慵懶的人所(suo)恐zhi)宓A href="http://www.duwenzhang.com/huati/wuliao/index1.html">無(wu)聊數字而已,而你(ni)既不虛榮也不慵懶。

  Most importantly, make friends and be happy. College friends are often the best in life, because during college you are closer to them physically than to your family. Also, going through independence and adulthood is a natural bonding experience. Pick a few friends and become really close to them pick the ones who are genuine and sincere to you. Don't worry about their hobbies, grades, looks, or even personalities. You have developed some real friendships in high school in your last two years, so trust your instinct, and make new friends. You are a genuine and sincere person anyone would enjoy being your friend, so be confident, outgoing, and pro-active. If you think you like someone, tell her. You have very little to lose. Give people the benefit of the doubt; don't stereotype and be forgiving. People are not perfect, so as long as they are genuine and sincere, trust them and be good to them. They will give back. This is my secret of success that I am genuine with people and trust them (unless they do something to lose my trust). Some people tell me that occasionally I would be taken advantage of. They are right, but I can tell you that that loss is nothing compared to what I gained. In my last 18 years leading people, I have realized that only one thing matters to gain the trust and respect of others, and to do so, you need to trust and respect others first. Whether it is for management, work, or friendship, this is something you should ponder.

最重要(yao)的是在大學里你(ni)要(yao)交一些(xie)朋友(you),快(kuai)樂生活。大學的朋友(you)往往是qiao)ming)中最好的朋友(you),因為在大學里你(ni)和朋友(you)能夠近(jin)距離(li)交往。另外(wai),在一塊兒成長(chang),一起(qi)獨立(li),很自(zi)然地你(ni)們就會(hui)緊緊地系在一起(qi),成為密友(you)。你(ni)應該挑(tao)選一些(xie)真誠誠懇的朋友(you),跟他們親近(jin),別(bie)在乎他們的愛好、成績、外(wai)表甚(shen)至性格。你(ni)在高(gao)中的最後兩年已經交到了一些(xie)真正的朋友(you),所(suo)以(yi)盡可以(yi)相(xiang)信自(zi)己的直覺(jue),再交一些(xie)新朋友(you)吧。你(ni)是一個真誠的人,任何(he)人都會(hui)喜(xi)歡跟你(ni)做朋友(you)的,所(suo)以(yi)要(yao)自(zi)信、外(wai)向(xiang)、主動一點,如果你(ni)喜(xi)歡某(mou)人,就告(gao)訴她,就算她拒絕了,你(ni)也沒有(you)損失什(shi)麼(me)。以(yi)最大的善意去(qu)對人,不要(yao)有(you)成見,要(yao)寬容。人無(wu)完人,只(zhi)要(yao)他們很真誠,就信任他們,對他們友(you)善。他們將(jiang)給你(ni)相(xiang)同(tong)的回報,這是我成功(gong)的秘(mi)密——我以(yi)誠待人,信任他人(除非他們做了失信于我的事)。有(you)人告(gao)訴這樣有(you)時我會(hui)被佔便宜,他們是對的,但是我可以(yi)告(gao)訴你(ni)︰以(yi)誠待人讓我得到的遠(yuan)遠(yuan)超過我失去(qu)的。在我做管理的18年里,我學到一件很重要(yao)的事——要(yao)想得到他人的信任和尊(zun)重,只(zhi)有(you)先去(qu)信任和尊(zun)重他人。無(wu)論是管理、工作、交友(you),這點都值(zhi)得你(ni)參考。

  Do keep your high school friends, and stay connected to them, but do not use them as substitutes for college friendship, and do not spend too much time with them, because that would eat into your time to make new friends.

要(yao)和你(ni)高(gao)中時代的朋友(you)保持聯系,但是不要(yao)用(yong)他們來取代大學的友(you)誼,也不要(yao)把全部(bu)的時間都花在老朋友(you)身上,因為那(na)樣你(ni)就會(hui)失去(qu)交新朋友(you)的機會(hui)了。

  Start planning for your summers early what would you like to do? Where would you like to live? What would you like to learn? What have you learned in college that might change your mind? I think your plan of studying fashion is good, and you should decide where you want to be, and get into the right courses. We of course hope you come back to Beijing, but you should go where you think is best for you.

你(ni)還(huai)要(yao)早點開始(shi)規劃你(ni)的暑假(jia)——你(ni)想做什(shi)麼(me)?你(ni)想呆在哪(na)兒?你(ni)想學點什(shi)麼(me)?你(ni)在大學里學習是否會(hui)讓你(ni)有(you)新的打算?我覺(jue)得你(ni)學習藝術設計pin)募隻 懿淮恚 ni)應該想好你(ni)該去(qu)哪(na)兒學習相(xiang)應的課程。我們當bi)幌Mni)回到北京,但是最終的決定是你(ni)的。

  Whether it is summer-planning, or coursework planning, or picking a major, or managing your time, you should take control of your life. In the past, I have helped you quite a bit, whether it is in college application, designing your extracurricular activities, or picking the initial coursework. I will always be there for you, but the time has come for you to be in the driver's seat this is your life, and you need to be in control. I will always remember the exhilarating feeling in my life that I got to decide to skip kindergarten, that I got to decide to change to computer science major, that I got to decide to leave academia for Apple, that I got to decide to go to China, that I got to decide to go to Google, and most recently, that I got to decide to start my own business. Being able to decide means you get to live the life that you want to. Life is too short to live the life others do or others want you. Being in control feels great. Try it, and you'll love it!

不huai)蓯鞘羆jia)計劃,功(gong)課規劃,抑zhi)蚴茄 ㄒ擔 芾硎奔洌 ni)都應該負責(ze)你(ni)的人生。過去(qu)不huai)蓯巧(qiao)shen)請學校、設計課外(wai)活動或者選擇(ze)最初的課程,我都ji)優(you)園鎦四(si)ni)不少。以(yi)後,我仍然會(hui)一直站你(ni)身旁,但是現在是你(ni)自(zi)己掌舵的時候了。我常常記起(qi)我生命(ming)中那(na)qie)├ling)人振(zhen)奮的時刻——在幼兒園決定跳級,決定轉到計算機科學專業,決定離(li)開學術界選擇(ze)Apple,決定回中國,決定選擇(ze)Google,乃(nai)至最近(jin)選擇(ze)創辦我的新公司(si)。有(you)能力進行選擇(ze)意味(wei)著(zhou)你(ni)會(hui)過上自(zi)己想要(yao)的生活。生命(ming)太短暫了,你(ni)不能過別(bie)人想要(yao)你(ni)過的生活。掌控(kong)自(zi)己的生命(ming)是很棒的感覺(jue),試(shi)試(shi)吧,你(ni)會(hui)愛上它的!

  I told your mom I'm writing this letter, and asked what she wanted me to say. She thought and said: "just ask her to take care of herself." Simple but deeply caring that is how your mother is, and that is why you love her so much. In this simple sentence is her hope that you will become independent in the way you take care of yourself that you will remember to take your medicine, that you will get enough sleep, that you will have a balanced diet, that you will get some exercise, and that you will go see a doctor whenever you don't feel good. An ancient Chinese proverb says that the most important thing to be nice to your parents is to take care of yourself. This is because your parents love you so much, and that if you are well, they will have comfort. You will understand this one day when you become a mother. But in the meantime, please listen to your mother and take care of yourself.

我告(gao)訴你(ni)媽(ma)媽(ma)我yi)諦湊夥廡牛 仕you)什(shi)麼(me)想對你(ni)說的,她想了想,說“讓她好好照顧(gu)自(zi)己”,很簡(jian)單卻飽含著(zhou)真切(qie)的關心——這一向(xiang)是你(ni)深(shen)愛的媽(ma)媽(ma)的特(te)點。這短短的一句(ju)話,是她想提醒你(ni)很多(duo)事情,比(bi)如要(yao)記得自(zi)己按時吃藥,好好睡覺(jue),保持健康的飲食(shi),適(shi)量運動,不舒服的時候要(yao)去(qu)看醫生等等。中國有(you)句(ju)古(gu)語,說“身體發膚,受之父(fu)母,不敢毀傷,孝(xiao)之始(shi)jia)病薄U餼ju)話的意思(si)用(yong)比(bi)較xian)碌姆椒ㄚ故shi)就是說︰父(fu)母最愛的就是你(ni),所(suo)以(yi)照顧(gu)好自(zi)己就是qie)?匙詈玫姆椒 5蹦ni)成為母親的na)na)天,你(ni)就會(hui)理解這些(xie)。在那(na)天之前,听媽(ma)媽(ma)的,你(ni)一定要(yao)好好照顧(gu)自(zi)己。

  College is the four years where you have:

  •the greatest amount of free time

大學是你(ni)自(zi)由時間最多(duo)的nai)哪(na)輟

  •the first chance to be independent

大學是你(ni)第一次學會(hui)獨立(li)的nai)哪(na)輟

  •the most flexibility to change

大學是可塑性最強的nai)哪(na)輟

  •the lowest risk for making mistakes

大學是犯錯代價(jia)最低的nai)哪(na)輟

  So please treasure your college years make the best of your free time, become an independent thinker in control of your destiny, evolve yourself into a bi-cultural talent, be bold to experiment, learn and grow through your successes and challenges.

所(suo)以(yi),珍惜你(ni)的大學時光(guang)吧,好好利用(yong)你(ni)的空閑(xian)時間,成為掌握(wo)自(zi)己命(ming)運的獨立(li)思(si)考者,發展自(zi)己的多(duo)元化才能,大膽地去(qu)嘗試(shi),通(tong)過不斷的mou)曬gong)和挑(tao)戰來學習和成長(chang),成為融匯中西的人才。

  When I faced the greatest challenge and opportunity in my life in 2005, you gave me a big hug and said "bonne chance", which means "good luck" and "good courage". Now I do the same for you. Bonne chance, my angel and princess. May Columbia become the happiest four years in your life, and may you blossom into just what you dream to be.

當我yi)005年面對人生最大的挑(tao)戰時,你(ni)給了我大大的擁抱,還(huai)跟我說了一句(ju)法語“bonne chance”。這句(ju)話代表“祝你(ni)勇敢,祝你(ni)好運!”現在,我也想跟你(ni)說同(tong)樣的話,bonne chance,我的天使和公主,希望哥倫比(bi)亞(ya)成為你(ni)一生中最快(kuai)樂zhi)乃(nai)哪(na)輳 Mni)成為你(ni)夢想成為的人!

      Love,
      愛你(ni)的,

      Dad (& Mom)

      爸爸(和媽(ma)媽(ma))


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